Michael Ax: Thoughts

What Is Enlightenment? - Issue 16: "KB: Have you ever had your chromosomes tested? WIE: Not that I'm aware of. KB: Then how do you know whether you have a male body or a female body? There are actually fourteen possible combinations at that particular chromosome level. There's XX, XY, XXY, YYX, XO, XXX, XOX. . . . Does that mean there are fourteen genders? So gender isn't at the level of chromosomes. WIE: Well, there are the typical secondary sex characteristics that generally identify our bodies as male or femaleâ014breasts, facial hair, etc. And we also present ourselves as a particular gender, such as in the way we dress or wear our hair. But the idea I'm getting at is the possibility of transcending gender identification while living in a world where we still inhabit bodies that are identified as male or female."

chromosome testing?

Howling Mad Over Hollings' Bill

"Jim Dinda's apartment is a high-tech entertainment haven, but that could change if a bill that restricts how electronics devices work is passed into law."

if this passes then corporations rather than individuals will truly be the benefactors of this goverment. pretty soon everyone will know their place in the new society. no more existential angst. we'll all get assigned a slot that tells us who we are in the new/old corporate feudalism.

having watched jules verne on tv some weeks ago this makes me think that perhaps the people paying our legislators would feel more at home in czarist russia. they'd not have to pretend that either they or anyone else is in favor of the individual.

speaking of tv... it hit me the other day that there are no more individual heroes. its all teams working for more or less faceless directors, or to agendas that give them special treatment under the law. there's no more support for the individual.. seemed that way anyhow.

anyway.. this bill is just one of the countless assaults by corporate rent-seekers who would not have a role if individuals were truly making up the market.

"Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions." Terry Pratchett, The Truth [*]

passion is a substitute for confidence

"Faith, Enthusiasm, and passionate intensity in general are substitutes for the self-confidence born of experience and the possession of skill. Where there is the nescessary skill to move mountains there is no need for the faith that moves mountains." that is one of the awesome observations made by Eric Hoffer in his pocketsized treatise on "The ordeal of change".

Its an older book and some of the examples seem quaint yet at the same time they are clearly generic observations on our human experience. He names many more of the dynamics that we find in the chemistry of our souls and I'm having a wonderful time traveling along with him into the depth of his book on an otherwise slightly crazed day. I know the ride/ the truth of how drastic change causes us to be misfits .. and how that experience liberates passions that drive us into action.

so far the book's offering a fresh and cool look at the process of change, thats one we all begrudgingly accept sooner or later.

social barriers to honesty

more and more the people in my life recognize me for being able to speak honestly and comprehensively from my perceptions without triggering them into reactions.

technically & energetically i see that as confirmation of my own healing, enabling me to be present with others and to speak to, or to draw forth the honest lived quandries in their lives -- because i know them from within.

sure beats getting killed for speaking honestly and from my humanity. the aborted characters and their hostility to honesty still puzzle me but i'm mostly fine tolerating them now. i keep thinking about how less than total honesty gets you wiped out in the oriental game of go.

rule-breakers

for students of the i-ching, the hexagram 44 with line 3 moving is a good pictoral synopsis of how i experience/map these rule-breakers. annoying as they are, at least there's a spot on the map for them. 44.3->6.

more rule-breakers

a friend of mine upon realizing that her boy-friend was making up a story about a flat tire turned on his computer to find that the man was having/grooming relations with quite a number of other women.

a little research revealed that he was a a motel with another woman. some spectacular upset, and a telephone confrontation with the man in the motel later, she's gotten to clarity about how that relationship was not for her.

she's got the same f* conflict about wanting to trust.. and knowing that trusting in this case would only go against herself.

while not _that charged about my little upset today, I can really relate to her upset because i've been in the same boat before.

what do you _do_ with these people internally? on the outside we can let other's know that they are being lied to.. but having ignored our own little voices.. what chances are there that others could or would hear from the outside what they blind themselves to on the inside.

tough stuff. yucky too.

rule-breakers

what do you do with a person who has a pattern of changing agreements in their favor without giving notice or communicating their changes.. so-called improvements.. back to you.. but only presents you with an altered outcome, saying that it was their right to change the terms of the deal without negotiation.

i'm faced with such a person who just broken my trust in this manner once again. it took over a year to recover from the first time she's done this to me.. and i'm still aching. now, i've again met her with trust .. and a verbal agreement and she's changed the rules again. i'm not accepting the deal of course, but what's one to do?

she claims she doesnt know why she does these things and i'm saddled with hours of grief over this. i'm not going to hurt or go against her ... but i will move to fortify my position so that the gravy going her way right now comes back to me.

it totally bugs me that i didn't listen to the little voice that said to spell out in writing even the little tiny deal we just did. i'd have trusted a total stranger with doing the right thing here. bummer.

MindZine - Go - Features Index: "The Forgotten Match A fascinating look into the background and psychology of an historic event - a story that will grip even the non-player. "

i'm really getting hooked on go now that i've crossed the line and let myself play that startegy online for lack of local players. this is an incredible site for stories and context.

Search for yourself online “It shows you just how little control we all have over our personal information. It also underscores the sorry state of privacy protection in the U.S.”

imagine the US doing a privacy protection month ... hypothetically, coordinating that, rather than troops in 14 other countries, strikes me to be close to why we have goverment to begin with.