Mary Wehmeier's Blog Du Jour
Pixel Interpreter: injecting common sense into technology and life.

 


















Click to see the XML version of this web page.

Click here to send an email to the editor of this weblog.
 
 

American Airlines Issues Summer Travel Tips

Today this email came from American Airline regarding Summer Travel Tips. The comments in Red are mine.  Enjoy!


Dear Mary Wehmeier,

Okay got the name right...

With the summer travel season nearly here, now is a good time to provide some tips on getting through the airports more efficiently now that the federal government has taken over responsibility for security screening. By keeping some of these tips and new procedures in mind, you will know what to expect on the way to your destination - and it should provide for a smoother trip through the airport.

And keep you from getting really pissed off at us.

We know that your travel experience begins before you leave home or work and our newly redesigned Web site, www.aa.com, will help you on your way. AA.com is your first stop for the latest travel news, current gates and times and much more. It keeps you connected with the latest airport information by using the latest in technology. Yeah. When it working. For example, our Flight Status Notification feature is an exclusive service that sends updated flight information messages to your phone, alphanumeric pager, email address or personal digital assistant (PDA). Sign up at www.aa.com/notify and we'll do the rest.

This actually sounds like a good deal if they do honestly keep it updated in real time. But it's not likely from previous experience.

American also is dedicated to providing automation at the airport to help keep you from waiting in lines. At 85 U.S. airports, you can use one of more than 300 OneStopSM Curbside check-in machines to check bags and receive a boarding pass for a domestic flight, then go through security and straight to your gate. This service is available with either a paper or electronic ticket. If you don't check in curbside, domestic customers with electronic tickets can avoid lines and check in at our OneStopSM Self-Service machines adjacent to ticket counters at 27 U.S. airports, with more on the way. Remember DOMESTIC CUSTOMERS, not you fools going to Europe. Just look for the yellow arrows that point the way to OneStop. At these easy-to-use touch screen units, you can select or change your seat, check baggage and obtain boarding passes. Just swipe your AAdvantage® top-tier member card or a major credit card to start.

Yeah we want your credit card or you to pay for this privelege. However it's another good idea to keep you out of the ticket counter line, if it works.

As you approach the security checkpoints, you will have to show your boarding pass or e-ticket confirmation with a government-issued photo ID before approaching the screening devices. Here are the rest of the steps in the federally mandated and managed screening process:

Your papers please.  Ut oh... here we go through the gates of hell...

  • The first screen is the familiar walk-through metal detector. If the alarm sounds, the passenger will be asked to step aside for further screening using a hand-held metal detector in conjunction with a pat-down search. Make sure all the extra darn metal is off your body. At the same time, carry-on items are subject to x-ray search. One standard-size carry-on bag is allowed along with one personal item such as a purse, laptop computer, briefcase or small book-type backpack. Carry-ons are smaller these days in order to wedge another couple people on the cattlecar-- er plane. Any sharp items such as scissors and knives will not be allowed in the cabin, so they should be placed in checked baggage. Okay so I can't bring my knitting needles, or sewing scissors onboard. Any ideas? I needlepoint during those 2-3 hr. flights.
  • If the x-ray machine operator sees an object that can not be identified or may be the size or shape of items that are no longer allowed to be carried on, the bag must be further screened by examining the bag with a special wand used to identify explosive residue. Bags might also be physically searched. This is if they are awake at the machine. Also expect them to make you turn on your PDA, Cell phone and laptop computer.
  • Additionally, any person who has a bag selected for additional search must have his or her footwear inspected.  Jeeze here we go. Wear slipons and clean socks.
  • Randomly selected passengers will have their footwear inspected.
    Lovely are they going to tear apart my orthotics too? They tried this about a month ago and never said sorry. Cost: $230.
  • Once you have reached your departure gate, randomly selected passengers will be re-screened throughout the boarding process. The FAA has also mandated random checks of carry-on luggage at the gate, and random personal searches with hand-held metal detectors during the boarding process. If you are selected for this additional screening, we appreciate your cooperation and patience. This is where your 3 yr old kid and grandmother get the pat down. Lovely.
  • The government has heard many concerns about the consistency of checkpoint operations. While American and other airlines are working with the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) to ensure consistency, that is regrettably not always the case. Interpretation of the requirements still often varies. Yeah, this statement is so we CYA'ed ourselves in case the people doing the checking haven't read the rules. eh.
  • Please keep in mind that since February 17, 2002, the TSA controls the checkpoints. American Airlines is working with the TSA to resolve inconsistencies. Yeah. Don't blame us. Blame TSA. Uh huh. Once you resolve those issues will you tell us? Not.

Summer vacations are an American tradition. At American Airlines and American Eagle, we're happy to be a part of your summer get-away, and we want your trip through the airport to be secure and efficient. Have a great summer.

And keep spending your money with us. We need it. Those goverment bailouts weren't enough to pay our fuel bills.



Mike Gunn
Executive Vice President
Marketing and Planning

MLW Signature on file with the elevator operator

Mary Wehmeier
American Consumer
In Charge of Paying Your Salary and Company's Freight

 


Click here to visit the Radio UserLand website. © Copyright 2002 Mary Wehmeier.
Last update: 5/23/02; 3:48:36 PM.