Edward Goodwin: Dogs

Thu, 08 Jul 2004 16:28:13 GMT

In other news, Taylor is doing much better now. He still has another week of wearing the cone, but he seems to really enjoy it. He's not scratching his ear all that much anymore and he gets a kick out of running past us at top speed and goring our legs with the cone, so I think it's a net-positive event for him.

In the meantime, his cone has become quite distorted and misshapen as he has banged it into everything possible. He's also discovered that he can use it as a food shovel to keep Bandit from stealing his food. He runs after the food and scoops it up and deposits it a few feet away in a safer location. Either that or he'll just use the cone to cover and protect the whole food bowl leaving nothing visible as he eats in peace. Who said that humans are the only animals that use tools?

Fri, 02 Jul 2004 18:29:43 GMT

Audrey snapped this shot of our dog, Taylor, yesterday after he came home from a tough day of surgery to deal with an aural hematoma that he developed last week. Commonly referred to as "pillow ear", it is apparently really common in golden retrievers and less frequent in other floppy-eared dogs. It's basically a huge swelling of the ear caused by the dog shaking his head or scratching his ear too vigorously. It's kind of like the doggy equivalent of a hernia. So now our dog gets to walk around with a big cone on his head for the better part of two weeks so that he won't scratch open the sutures or remove the stent they've put in his ear to drain it.

At first he was quite frightened and confused by the cone-head, which was funny because he would just sit in the middle of the living room, unable to see his feet or anything else that wasn't directly in front of him. The anasthesia hadn't worn off so he was wanting to sleep but afraid to lie down. So he was just sitting there and swaying back and forth trying hard not to fall over from pure exhaustion. After we figured out what was going on, I grabbed his front legs and pulled them slowly out from under him and laid him down and he went right to sleep.

His energy is back today so he is running around the house looking like a furry half-dog, half-light bulb hybrid that gets caught on furniture and bangs into walls alot.

Thu, 17 Jun 2004 16:19:35 GMT

One of the things that no one ever really prepares you for about dog ownership is the fact that dogs tend to have certain etiquette levels that are vastly different from humans. Sure, everyone knows that dogs like to sniff each others' butts. But watching your own dog with his nose crammed halfway up another dog's porthole is worlds away from seeing a neighborhood dog sniffing some other dog. It's like night and day.

So dogs have no concept of germs, bacteria, dirt, grime or slime. What this means is that everytime your dog goes outside, (s)he's just so happy to be outside that they go running around sniffing everything, bouncing around like a lunatic, and basically thinking the world is one big, giant toybox. The other day we were out in the woods when Taylor goes tearing into the trees in pursuit of a snake. A snake! Now any self respecting species that had evolved through natural selection would have a genetically ingrained fear of snakes (unless you're Rikki Tikki Tavi, in which case you can ignore my arguments). My dogs, however, through repeated human-controlled eugenics programs, and consistently banging their heads on the coffee table every time they get up have bred this fear right out of themselves. Lucky for us in this instance a) it was a garter snake and b) Taylor is not the great, white hunter he thinks he is. I'm rambling but my basic point is that when dogs go out in the wilderness they attract things that we as humans don't want in our houses.

So last night at about 12:30am I head off to bed. Bandit is at the foot of the bed and I'm lazily petting him when I feel a small bump beneath his fur on his hind leg. I immediately sat bolt upright and dragged him into the bathroom where I could turn on the light and see what the heck this bump was. Once I did that my suspicions were confirmed...it was a tick.

Now one of the things that goes along with being married is that, as the guy of the house, you are responsible for the handling of all "gross, icky things" disposal duties. This means that when you or the wife discover that green and purple glowing dish in the back of the fridge that used to be Tuna Casserole it is your duty to not only throw it in the trash, but immediately don your haz-mat suit and clean the dish it was on as well. This duty extends from everything from rotten leftovers, to rodent catching. It definitely includes dog-parasite disposal.

So this is a ritual I have become accustomed to. Our dogs' fur is so thick that it will usually be a week or two before we discover the ticks. The dogs don't feel the need to tell us about these things, because of their basic lack of decent manners. That and the fact that they are mortally afraid of anything that involves cleaning. Baths, vacuum cleaners, dustbusters, you name it. In the meantime, these ticks get all fat and juicy, gorging themselves on my dogs' vital fluids.

Fully awake now, I whipped into action. Standing in my boxer shorts at 12:45am, I was a man possessed with a purpose. I pulled out my trusty sidearms, a bottle of isopropyl alcohol I call "Ole Bessy" and a pair of tweezers that have never met a tick they couldn't handle. Bandit of course knew what was coming and darted into the closet to hide amongst the dirty laundry (which is further proof that our dog hates cleanliness).

Pulling him back out into the bathroom I sprung into action, dabbing the tick with an alcohol-soaked cotton swab of vengeance. Then, I gripped him in my tweezers and I slowly pulled on him. He fought back, his legs kicking vigorously. I felt him dig in further.

Realizing I was losing this battle, I sought to grip him closer to his head with the tweezers. Then I gave it everything I had. At this point, I think I heard him scream. Then with a pop, his tick hindquarters exploded just as his head came free. I fell backwards in relief, his mangled tick-body dangling from the tweezers. Bandit gave me this incredulous look and trotted off to hide amongst the dirty laundry.

I looked towards the sky in praise of the tick-plucking gods of my forebears. And that was when I noticed there was a black smudge on my glasses. I took them off and inspected them and realized that I had tick guts on my glasses!

To reiterate: THERE WERE TICK-GUTS ON MY GLASSES! What this means is that, had I not been wearing my glasses I would have taken a tick-gut to the eye! I'm not much on all this parasite stuff but I do know that these things carry Lyme-disease and I definitely don't think my eye would like that. Some of the systems of Lyme disease include hair loss and swelling; none of which my eye would like very much. If all my eyelashes fell out, I would be pissed.

Anyway, I guess the point of all of this is to ALWAYS, ALWAYS wear protective gear when removing ticks. They are fiery suckers and they are likely to go off at a moments notice.

Mon, 19 Apr 2004 20:52:10 GMT

The Merck Veterinary Manual - so you can diagnose your pets problems over the internet!

Fri, 24 Oct 2003 19:07:59 GMT

In New York City, dogs matched to zip code by breed It appears you can tell alot about a person by the dog breed he/she owns and even reasonably predict where they live as a New York Times analysis of dog licensing data demonstrates. ...

Lap dogs are more often found in the lap of luxury. According to the city's statistics, more Shih Tzus live on the Upper East Side in the 10021 ZIP code than in any other neighborhood in the city. And those residents also have a penchant for naming their dogs Lucy, more so than New Yorkers in any other area... [NY Times]

These are the types of statistical studies I really dig on. They kind of sit at the edge of psychology and statistics. Sure most of them end up drawing false or untenable correlations, but the ones that do point out true links provide some real interesting insight. via [Dog News: weird, inspiring dog tales]

Thu, 23 Oct 2003 15:21:04 GMT

Ocean City, Maryland dog dogs. A dog owner in Maryland makes the same realization that I made a few years ago, which is the fact that your dogs don't really care about living conditions as long as YOU ARE AROUND. Their order of preference is to be 1) In your presence or 2) In their home being fed by a friend who they recognize or 3) Being fed by some complete stranger in their home. Being fed in a strange location is so distant from any of the other 3 options that my dogs will border on paranoia when it occurs.

Even so, we had a terrific time. We even treated our dogs to a doggy day care stay... we thought it would delight and pamper our two dogs.
...

We humans are stupid. Both dogs were just frantic when we picked them up. Both were dehydrated, and panting, with dry tongues... and drank 16 ounces of water each, right before I put them in the car. Neither one had eaten any treats, not even the greenies they loved. Neither one had eaten all day ... too scared to eat. I don't know if either one was walked or why they hadn't drank any water or even if they had water. I had asked for water, when I saw their water bowl was empty, before I left them in 'day care.' Both dogs were restless that night and stayed close to us...

via [Dog News: weird, inspiring dog tales]

Wed, 23 Jul 2003 13:13:40 GMT

Police dog dies in hot car TX [Amarillo Globe News] I was appalled when I read the title of this post but upon reading the article it doesn't look like negligence was involved. Most K-9 officers are extremely protective of their dogs and treat them like a member of their own family. This was a case of the air conditioning kicking off while the dog was in the car unattended. The article is worth a read for any pet owner who has to occassionally leave their dog in the car for any amount of time because it tells you several instances where a modern car AC will shut down, putting your dog in danger. via [Dog News: weird, inspiring dog tales]

Fri, 11 Jul 2003 21:03:49 GMT

Alright, so this was just too cute not to post. July 4th weekend we introduced my dog Bandit to my nephew Jayce. We were a little worried about the whole thing since Bandit is a very pack oriented animal who we thought might see Jayce as a threat to his place in the pecking order of the family. Bandit has also been tormented by small children before and always acts a little nervous around them.

Anyway, the fears turned out to be unfounded. He absolutely loved the kid and spent the entire weekend guarding him zealously. He would perch by the kid and would immediately start whimpering to get our attention whenever the baby would make any noise. He even kept his voice down, refusing to bark around the baby. Here we see Bandit on guard protecting Jayce from the evil mosquitoes of Bridge City.

Sun, 29 Jun 2003 22:17:07 GMT

4 days have passed and my dogs are still not used to being tortured by my Incredible Hulk Hands! Bandit just looks at me with this scared look as I chase after him shaking my gargantuan green fist that yells at him such cool catch phrases as, "Hulk SMASH!!!"

To add to his fright we just bought a nifty, ultra-swaggerific Hoover steam cleaner. Both my dogs regard it and it's evil bastard cousin, our vacuum cleaner, with a fair amount of confusion and dread. Dogs make house cleaning so much more fun...and futile. No sooner have we finished cleaning than we let them out into the yard so they can track more mud in.

Sun, 13 Apr 2003 19:26:12 GMT

test...hopefully this updates the nav links. Success!

Ok, it appears that Radio will look for any file with a #navigatorLinks prefix...whether it be .txt, .xml, .opml, or .bak (which Windows editors love putting all over the place...which is what was screwing me up).

Sat, 12 Apr 2003 23:33:13 GMT

updated the menu list since a lot of my web reading was getting stale...

Tue, 08 Apr 2003 04:19:41 GMT

'dog attack' prevention.

Family dog's attack on great-grandmother leaves indelible memories TN Nobody could have predicted a family dog's on a great-grandmother, especially the great-grandmother. Often, she went outside and put BJ, the 90 pound pit bull, back in his kennel and yard when he escaped it; he had never challenged her before. Nor could she fathom the ferocious strength of the dog as it almost ripped her arm off, while she attempted to keep it from her throat... [Tallahassee Democrat]

[Dog News: weird, inspiring dog tales]

Thu, 03 Apr 2003 00:27:39 GMT

Play it safe with dogs [Coshocton Tribune, OH] A must read for parents who want to ensure a safe environment when children and dogs play together.

via [Dog News: weird, inspiring dog tales]

Wed, 26 Feb 2003 19:50:50 GMT

RIP Mike the dog. One morning in July of 1988, my sisters woke me up and told me that we got a dog... via [Damn that kid and his douchebaggery!]

Sun, 16 Feb 2003 22:53:13 GMT

Is it lucky or unlucky to find a 4 leaf clover growing out of a steaming hot pile of dog crap?

Sun, 19 Jan 2003 23:49:32 GMT

My other dog Bandit doesn't get sick that often but is decidedly less social. Today while we were at the HP Houston Marathon, we saw several spectators with dogs watching the festivities. I started imagining how fun it would be to load my dog into the car and take him to watch an event like the marathon. So here I am cueing happy, fun, Disney style music in my brain as my dog and I gaze upon the multitudes of marathoners in peace and tranquility in my head.

Then I started thinking of a vision closer to reality. Reality would work like this: Bandit sees another dog walking by on the side of the road, tries to tear across road to establish his dominance (ie rip the throat out of the other dog), gets tangled around the knees of the oncoming marathoners, uses his leash like a lasso to bring them to the ground, becomes scared as he gets tangled and begins jumping around and yelping. Panic ensues, cops come, we are escorted away from marathon. End of story.

*Sigh* It's probably better that I left him at home today.

Sun, 19 Jan 2003 23:41:39 GMT

My dog Taylor is sick and has been for about two days now. He's throwing up about twice a day. He has a pretty weak stomach and mild allergies to a whole host of different things and a voracious appetite which requires him to eat everything he sees. What this means is that he gets sick and begins throwing up probably every couple of months when he eats some generally harmless thing that affects his digestion (like a sock for instance).

It always sucks at times like these because you always end up hunched over the vomit like some sort of forensic scientist trying to backtrack the dog's digestive endeavors over the last 48 hours to determine what is the cause of his woes. After doing this a few times you begin to wish you had one of those super dogs like Lassie that could simultaneously rescue Timmy from an abandoned mineshaft and do cartwheels while barking out what unusual thing he ate in the last few hours in some sort of doggy-phonetics that you could understand. The worst part is the fact that since the dog ate something several hours before it got sick, you know there is no way in hell it's going to make the mental connection that what he ate before is what made him sick. So basically, it's a crappy issue that is destined to repeat itself every few months.

Thu, 05 Dec 2002 04:42:54 GMT

I've come to the conclusion that nothing is a greater example of sheer, unbridled joy than a golden retriever that has found something new and exciting to chew on.

Fri, 22 Nov 2002 21:19:15 GMT

As per Kinman's request, a picture of my other dog, Taylor.

Sun, 17 Nov 2002 15:28:59 GMT

yesterday we (my wife and I) went to PetSmart to take care of all our pet shopping needs. First off, PetSmart is an

amazingly crazy store...it's the Target of pet items. From stylish dog beds (which we bought), to stylish dog leashes (which we also bought), to treats shaped like different things (candy canes just in time for the holidays), it's got it all. You can bring your pets to the store, and they have training classes there as well.

We bought some cow hooves for our dogs as treats. They are cheap ($0.89 apiece) and the dogs can chew on them for hours. The problem is they stink. They smell like a cross between an open, spoiled jar of peanut butter and a fart after a twelve hour chili eating contest.

So here I sit, $100.00 lighter in the wallet, with 2 happy dogs and the rank stench of slobbery cow hoof around me.

Sun, 27 Oct 2002 19:15:41 GMT

Another great dog training site. I haven't read through it all yet but the first few articles seemed link-worthy.

Sun, 27 Oct 2002 02:21:24 GMT

Updated theme on the weblog to Moveable Radio: Blue. I think I'm done with theme updates for a little while so I can focus more on content

Sun, 27 Oct 2002 00:22:36 GMT

all the categories should have the same theme now

Sat, 26 Oct 2002 15:51:14 GMT

A weblog of weird dog tales.

Sat, 26 Oct 2002 15:48:56 GMT

Are you dog show material? Also, for you more intense dog-lovers, the Eukanuba Tournament of Champions in Houston premieres on AnimalPlanet tonight.