The Shadow Government Ltd.: From The Sports Desk

Hell Freezes Over

Thu, 28 Oct 2004 05:33:37 GMT

Hell Freezes Over

Red Sox 3

Cardinals 0

File under From The Sports Desk.

Credit Where Credit Is Due

Fri, 22 Oct 2004 01:15:07 GMT

Credit Where Credit Is Due

I've got to hand it to the Red Sox. They sure kicked the ass of my Yankees. It should be an interesting off-season. George ought to start placing the blame any day now. I hope it doesn't come down on Mel Stottlemeyer's head. He held that pitching staff together all year with smoke and mirrors.

It's too bad the Expos won't be around anymore. I'd like to trade Kevin Brown to that baseball purgatory.

One last thing. The Bambino's curse isn't dead yet. The curse has kept the Red Sox from winning the World Series, not being in the World Series.

LET'S GO CARDINALS (at least it's nice being able to hate Roger Clemens again).

File under From The Sports Desk.

Is April The Cruelest Month?

Sun, 17 Oct 2004 20:16:02 GMT

Is April The Cruelest Month?

I guess if you're a Red Sox fan you'd have to say that October is. Even though I'm a Yankee fan, I didn't take a whole lot of pleasure in the savage beating the Yanks gave the Bosox last night. Boston's a much better team than that.

My son plays fall baseball and has a doubleheader every Sunday. Today I was watching his team play against a backdrop of fall colors on the Ramapo Mountains. I got to thinking about something I've always wanted to do but still have never gotten around to doing. I've always wanted to go down to Florida during spring training and follow the Yankees around the Grapefruit League. See the teams play while the hope of every fan, other than those rooting for the Mets, is still new, before the reality of the long season sets in. Everybody's still in the pennant race and the "next year" that all but the fans of the World Series winner has begun.

When I was a kid one of the sports writers for our local paper used to go down to Florida and follow the Phillies, a team I detested. But I still used to enjoy his articles about the trips from one town to another, the restaurants he'd eat in, and the weather. I particularly enjoyed his stories about dinners with the other columnists at Bern's Steak House in Tampa. To me, getting to do that would be like a kid loose in a candy store.

I've been lucky enough to have visited Bern's, although not during spring training. I doubt I'll get around to it this coming spring but, who knows? When pitchers and catchers report hope always springs eternal, even in the hearts of the Red Sox fans.

File under From The Sports Desk.

Hey Boston

Thu, 14 Oct 2004 03:49:17 GMT

Hey Boston!

There's nothing like shutting up 55,000 New Yorkers.

Who's your Daddy?

File under ~~From The Sports Desk~~ Curse of the Bambino.

pwn3d! (again!)

Mon, 20 Sep 2004 05:06:24 GMT

pwn3d! (again!)

File under ~~From The Sports Desk~~ Curse of the Bambino.

Yawn

Thu, 16 Sep 2004 01:32:39 GMT

Yawn

The National Hockey League will lock out its players Thursday, threatening to keep the sport off the ice for the entire 2004-05 season. Do you think anybody will notice?

File under From The Sports Desk.

So I'm A Racist?

Mon, 06 Sep 2004 05:02:31 GMT

So I'm A Racist?

So, just because I think that that the overpaid, underachieving team of NBA crybabies who got their asses handed to them by Argentina suck, that makes me a racist?

You know what? Jason Whitlock, the jackass that wrote that article, is the racist. And he's just as clueless as that team was about what happened to them and why.

Still Wondering What Hit Them

File under From The Sports Desk.

Easy For Me To Say

Sat, 28 Aug 2004 00:37:29 GMT

Easy For Me To Say

If I'm Paul Hamm, I'd give the medal back. Why would I want to keep something so tainted? Why would I want something that I really didn't win? Of course, being me, I wouldn't just give it back. I'd throw it in the faces of those pricks at the FIG (why do these governing bodies always have French names anyway?). Only after it had been suitably defaced of course. I liked the response by USOC secretary general Jim Scherr to the request by FIG president Bruno Grandi, that Hamm give the medal to South Korea's Yang Tae-young "as the ultimate demonstration of fair play."

In a letter back to Grandi, USOC secretary general Jim Scherr called the request "a blatant and inappropriate attempt on the part of (FIG) to once again shift responsibility for its own mistakes and instead pressure Mr. Hamm into resolving what has become an embarrassing situation for your federation."

"The USOC finds this request to be improper, outrageous and so far beyond the bounds of what is acceptable that it refuses to transmit the letter to Mr. Hamm," the letter said.

The entire "Olympic Movement" is nothing but a sham. It's all about the bucks folks.

In a related story, I see that the overpaid, underachieving team of NBA crybabies just got their asses handed to them by Argentina. Argentina. Let me say that again.

ARGENTINA.

I just shows to go you that you can't just slap together a bunch of individual stars at the last minute and hope to make them into a team. I for one am shedding no tears over this loss.

The Olympics are about nothing but hype, politics, corporate greed and corruption. Come to think of it, wasn't that just the kind of thing that killed the ancient Olympics?

One last note. The last thing that I want is for New York City to host the Olympics. Doesn't this town have a big enough bulls-eye painted on it for terrorists already without adding the Olympics to the equation?

File under From The Sports Desk.

Now That We Know What You Are Let's Negotiate The Price

Fri, 20 Aug 2004 02:13:53 GMT

Now That We Know What You Are Let's Negotiate The Price

A Connecticut Superior Court judge has ruled that the Big [L]east can't impose a $5 million fine on Boston College for defecting to the Atlantic Coast Conference, and it can't force BC to remain in the conference for an extra 15 months. The decision passed down by Wednesday will allow Boston College to join the ACC next July and pay a $1 million withdrawal fee to the Big East. According to Judge Allan van Gestel:

"Whatever Boston College might have said about its state of discussions or its expressed acceptance of a $5 million, 27-month penalty, that did not impede the Big East's ability to correctly amend its Constitution."

Lying two-faced weasel Gene DeFilippo, BC's athletic director was pleased with the decision:

"We are gratified that, after nearly a year of adverse and misleading public statements leveled against us, a respected judge has seen through to the actual merits of the case and has ruled in favor of Boston College."

Yeah Gene, you're not a $5 million dollar whore, only a $1 million one. Just another example of the farce that big-time college sports has become.

File under From The Sports Desk.

Still Clueless

Wed, 18 Aug 2004 03:11:06 GMT

Still Clueless

Your Dream Team™ pulled an upset, defeating the Greek National Team 77-71. Rumors are circulating that several jump shots were actually made by as many as several members of Your Dream Team™. If I sound like I'm being sarcastic, it's because I am.

Your Dream Team's™ mediocre performance against mediorcre oppositon has nothing to do with us Not Sending Our Best Players To The Olympics. These guys on Your Dream Team™ are, talentwise, still light years ahead of Your Dream Team's™ international competition. The problem is, a reasonably talented team playing team basketball can still defeat superior athletes playing the worst kind of playground ball. And that's the kind of basketball that Your Dream Team™ plays.

Clearly, however, no one will mistake Your Dream Team™ for The Dream Team that featured Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Larry Bird, Patrick Ewing (need I go on). Just look at the crap that passes for basketball in the NBA these days. Scoring is way down and it's not because of great defense. Nobody plays defense anymore.

I'm sure that the members of Your Dream Team™ thought that they would just walk out on the court and everybody on the other bench would shit their pants. Well that (hello Mr. Iverson) just ain't gonna happen. You guys have been exposed. Nobody's scared anymore.

The Brain Trust?

I was never a fan of Larry Brown, but I really feel sorry for the guy having to coach this bunch of prima donnas. You could tell by the player interviews after the Puerto Rico game that these guys still just don't get it. And yet, it's somehow fitting that Allen Iverson is the team captain of Your Dream Team™. Mr. "I Don't Need to Show Up For Practice", fine upstanding citizen that he is, owes more than $1,700 in parking and motor vehicle fines. Since March 2001, he has racked up at least 65 parking tickets totaling more than $4,500 on several of his cars. He's already paid $2,800, records show. Apparently, Mr. Iverson has a penchant for parking in handicapped spaces. Of course, maybe his handicap explains his woeful shooting so far.

AROUND THE HORN: On another note, if the Yankees don't get some real starting pitching, I don't care how many regular season games they win or how many runs they score, they aren't going to win the World Series. Hell, I'd be surprised if they win the ALCS. Shame on you Steinbrenner for letting Andy Pettite get away. By the way, isn't it interesting that the Yankees haven't won the World Series since they got rid of Chuck Knoblauch? They used to be a bunch of patient hitters who knew how to work a pitcher. Now, everybody's just swinging for the fences.

File under From The Sports Desk.