This is one of the dreams that gave me the message to "give up" and live effortlessly.
In the dream, I'm walking in a vast park, very green and shady, but dimly lit. I seem to be clearing a path as I go. I finally recognize that I'm approaching a crossroads, or rather, a dead end that meets a crossroads, forming a T. The road that crosses the path I'm on, seems to go toward a brightly lit town to the right, and off into more woods on the left. Towards the left, it's very muddy, with soft ruts up to two feet deep. There's even a pool across the road. I decide to turn back and retrace my steps.
As I turn to walk back, a figure comes over the horizon, running. Another follows. I watch with some curiosity as they approach me. As the two runners get very near, the one in front turns and stabs the one following him, with a knife. I stand shocked. The second man falls to the ground, apparently dead. The man who stabbed him looks over at me. I see that he's thinking he'll have to kill me too, because I witnessed this. I start to run but he stabs me right in the middle of my chest. Somehow I manage to stab him back. Apparently I kill him.
I rush over toward the town lights. Magically, I find myself by a phone. Someone is already calling for help, but keeps getting off onto other topics. I keep asking "I need help, I've been stabbed!" Finally I realize that I'm going to be all right. If I'd been stabbed to death I'd be dead by now. I relax and decide I'm OK.
Commentary:
The stabbing in my chest, I associate with the tightness in my chest that I've experienced in past weeks off an on - plus the "stabbing pain" that I've sometimes had in the center or right side of my chest. So this dream catches my attention right away. Is it explaining why I've been having this pain?
The first runner seems to be stabbing the second runner in order to keep first place, to win the race. Aha. I've been feeling that I'm running a race. I've often complained of this feeling. I'm in a race to earn money fast enough to pay bills, pay my expenses. I'm in a race to take "first place" slides fast enough to enter my new bowls in an exhibit. Etc. I've been running some kind of race all my life, from the elementary school races to earn straight A grades, to graduate school, on and on.
So right away, on waking, it seems clear that it's the racing, the firstborn's obsession with being first, being best, that it causing the stabbing pains. I could witness this - become conscious of it - and give it up and be OK. My Dream Producer seems to be suggesting this.
Now that I'm writing the dream again, I notice the crossroads more. The pool and mud to the left suggests going deeper into feelings. The brightly lit town (a convenience store maybe?) suggests what? Help from other people? In the dream I get the illusion that someone is helping, but they don't really pay any attention to me. Instead, I realize that I'm OK without the help. I'll think some more about this.
9:09:10 AM 
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