Marie Manthey: Conversations

Salon Update

Mon, 18 Jun 2007 15:27:24 GMT

The Nursing Salon has enjoyed some good publicity in the current issue (May/June) of NurseWeek, the Heartland Edition. We continue to experience, with the Salon, a healing of the hurts sometimes created by deep-seated problems within nursing practice. A sense of hope continues to be the most prevalent content on our check-out at the end of each discussion. No matter the number of people, no matter the age, no matter the level of education (we have LPNs and PhDs) no matter the specialty, no matter the setting -- when we come together to talk about what is currently on our mind about nursing, the talk is authentic, value-driven, and powerful.

I would love to see this idea spread. I believe some other groups have started up and I would love to hear from you, how it is going. I would be happy to help anyone get another group started, and I have information on how to go about doing so. It is practically stress-free for all of us.....me as the host and all those who come. If anyone wants info or help, email me at mmanthey@chcm.com. I will share our experiences, answer your questions and to what I can to support to your group.

Florence Marie Fischer

Fri, 16 Feb 2007 20:51:44 GMT

I had a most thrilling experience today …

Some of you may remember that I dedicated my book, The Practice of Primary Nursing to a nurse named Florence Marie Fischer. Sometimes when I speak, I tell my own story about how I became a nurse... and I always mention Florence Marie Fisher. I became ill at the age of 5 and was hospitalized for a month at St. Joseph's Hospital in Chicago. It was a traumatic experience in a couple of ways. First of all, my parents didn't know how to prepare me, since they had never been hospitalized themselves. So they just said I was going to a large building. They left me there and visited occasionally. However, when one or the other came, a very painful procedure was done involving an intramuscular injection of their blood (horribly painful), so I felt not only abandoned but also frightened and confused by the pain associated with their visit.

Florence Marie Fisher is the name of a nurse who cared for me. She would sit by my bedside and color in my coloring book. For some reason, that translated to me to mean she 'cared for me'. I decided right then that I wanted my life to be about that kind of caring, and from then on, I knew I would be a nurse. As a kid I often got doctor/nurse kits for Christmas, and I always threw away the doctor stuff. Only being a nurse was of any interest to me.

Forty years later I wrote the book on Primary Nursing. When I finished, the publisher asked me who I wanted to dedicate it to, and after a few minutes of thought I said Florence Marie Fisher. Although we had never communicated in any way after I left the hospital, I never forgot her name. And so the book was dedicated to her.

The publisher thought it would be really cool to find her, so they contacted the Illinois State Board of Nursing, whose records indicated she had moved to Indiana and that her last name was Ambrose. They then wrote to the Indiana Board to locate her, but there was no response to their request, and the search had come to an end.

It was earlier just today, when my search resumed. I was going through my papers in preparation for turning them over to the University of Minnesota Library Archives. I found copies of the publisher’s letters to the state boards and got to thinking about a way to search for Florence Marie Fischer that wasn’t available almost thirty years ago… the Internet.

Now for the thrilling part. I didn’t find her, but I found her son… and I just finished talking to him!

As I was explaining my connection to his mother, I got choked up several times just realizing I was actually talking to Florence Marie Fisher's son! He was just as thrilled to hear from me, as he had no idea of his mother’s impact on me. Out of nowhere he gets this call about the influence his mom had on me. She died in 1989, so I guess I was just meant to find him now.... not back in 1979 when I was writing my book.

He knew nothing of me, my work, or his mother's connection to that work. It is a straight line for me. And as I told him about my work, the book dedicated to his Mom… the impact on nursing and patient care this work has had… he got just as choked up as I was.

The connection we had was extraordinary. I never thought I would find her, and I guess technically I didn’t, but talking to her son felt very close. And being able to tell her son about the tremendous impact she had on me was one of the high points of my life!

I am sending him one of the few remaining first edition hard copies of The Practice of Primary Nursing and the second edition, which is also dedicated to Florence Marie Fischer.

Storytelling and Problem Solving

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 20:39:42 GMT

Staff nurses and nurse managers tell me they really like Crucial Conversations as a guide in managing morale problems. Here's the deal: morale problems are always caused by problems in interpersonal relations among the staff. This book gives very specific and useful advice about how to talk about important issues/behaviors that are a problem among co-workers. Everyone has to handle these issues for themselves. It usually doesn't work to expect the nurse manager to step in and solve problems at the staff nurse level. The more each individual develops the skill of managing their own relationships successfully, the healthier a unit's morale will be. The manager's job is to help the staff develop the skill to talk about difficult situations skillfully, so that a solution can be reached that doesn't make the situation worse.

Then, send us your stories about handling difficult situations. You never know when your experience will be a 'teachable moment' for someone else struggling with a similar problem.

I especially invite veteran nurses to share their stories. We are losing wisdom and a sense of our own history as the Baby Boomers begin to retire.

What is on Your Mind About Nursing Right Now?

Mon, 08 Jan 2007 16:43:02 GMT

It is my New Year's resolution to post to this blog more regularly.

Join me. Make it your resolution to comment on my writings.

Start today.

What is on your mind right now about nursing as you are reading this blog?

Just click on the blue “comments” link below this post and share your thoughts, concerns, hopes and fears. Others might want to comment. I know I will.

In the meantime, see what I am currently thinking about nursing as well as some of what I am hearing.

What Re-ignites You?

Thu, 07 Dec 2006 16:01:24 GMT

This past week I've had the pleasure to work with nurses in Arkansas and Missouri. I continue to be amazed at how simple truths about the nature of our work touch nurses deeply. At no time have I been with hard-shell attitudes or cynical skepticism.

Not that skepticism and resistance isn't there. It’s just that when we strip away the 'problem seeking' approaches we customarily use, there is an incredible source of positive energy waiting to be tapped. I don't remember this positive energy being so apparent in the past. I think this is part of the sea-change I sense happening in nursing.

There seems to be a much stronger recognition of the values that form the base of our profession. I sense a belief that we have solutions to problems caused by dysfunctional systems but we just aren't sure how to go about implementing them. I hear a clear appreciation of the importance of our intellect and our compassion.

I am encouraged by the whole notion of 'Re-igniting the Spirit'.

I want to hear from like nurses whose spirit has been re-ignited. Tell us how it happened and what it means to you on a daily basis.

Reflections on a Monday evening well spent

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 18:45:46 GMT

Had dinner last night with Jayne Felgen, the President of Creative Health Care Management. It is always so good to touch base with her. We are both into such interesting aspects of our work there is barely time to catch up with family and personal stuff. She has just returned from England where a group of dynamic individuals from eight countries are designing a research project about patient satisfaction in the context of a therapeutic relationship with a patient and nurse autonomy. These incredible individuals have been meeting in various places around the world as a result of a chance meeting on the deck of my house at a Sunday morning brunch during the last Summit of Sages in October 2004.

Which reminds me: watch for info on the Summit of Sages, October 14 - 16, 2007. Details are still being planned but we know the topic will be “Social justice as a core value of nursing” and the keynote speaker is Maya Angelou! It doesn't get much better than that!

Increased Salon Activity

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 20:51:11 GMT

I have always wondered what would happen if salons all over the county were touching the heart of nursing. It looks like I am beginning to find out:

Over the weekend, I received this email from Dawn, a nurse in Virginia.

Conversations with Ourselves

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 18:59:30 GMT

When I first posted my about the overwhelming response to my blog, I left off the comments emailed me by Gary Saltus, a physician colleague, which is a shame I left Gary's comments out because they are so vital to this discussion.

Read Gary's comments here.

Overwhelming Response

Fri, 28 Jul 2006 21:01:15 GMT

Wow! This whole activity of blogging has already opened more conversations and doors than I had dreamed of....

Going Live

Fri, 31 Mar 2006 17:12:32 GMT

So, here we are: after a few months of talking planning and learning by trial and error, we are ready to get my blog up and out there for everyone to see. I go forward in this with very mixed feelings. First of all I'm excited because, as I said in my first post, I see this as a new way for nurses to come together, discuss important issues, gain strength and focus while recognizing and respecting differences. I believe this kind of discussion will clarify our understanding of complex issues and help us discover new truths.

That is the good news. The hesitation is because I'm not exactly sure what a blog is and exactly how it works.

Welcome to the Salon

Mon, 12 Dec 2005 15:08:42 GMT

A few years ago I stepped down as president of Creative Health Care Management, a health care consulting firm I founded in the 1970s. I looked forward to letting go of the things I had to do and being able to take more time for the things I want to do.

One of the things I love is having more time to talk with nurses about nursing. Read more.